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So in just over a week, I have Ghost Chili seeds germanating. What gives?! According to the directinos that came with the seeds it takes 5-6 weeks for Ghost Chili seeds to germanate.
 Ghost Chili Germanation  Chili Sprouts  Ghost Chili sprouts in seed starter kit
A couple months ago I was laying on the beach in the Bahamas flipping through a “Smithsonian Magazine” and stumbled across an article about the hottest chili pepper in the world. According to the article the pepper grows wild in the mountains of India and has long been known by the natives as Bhut Jolokia or Naga Jolokia. The translation means “Ghost Chili”. So hot, that if you eat it, it will make you into a ghost. My interest was immediately sparked. According to the article, the natives use this super pepper to repel wild pacaderms from eating their gardens. Why do I need a pepper capable of repeling wild elephants you ask? Well… its the Bronx.. .anything to repel crack heads or the occasional dog that might decided to piss on my front lawn is a welcome addition to my Bronx Garden (like how I worked the name of the website into this article?!) I quickly went and googled “ghost chili” in the hopes I could buy a plant somewhere. Amazon had a guy selling some sort of seed kit but his ratings were so terrible I quickly moved on and found a guy based out of California who sells many types of exotic chili pepper seeds. His name is JimDuffy and he runs www.superhotchilis.com .
I ordered a packaged (10) of Ghost Chili seeds. Jim sells these seeds for a premium ( about $15) but also includes a bunch of other seeds. After about a week my seeds showed up in an envelope shipped through the regular mail. Inside where my Ghost Chili seeds as well as a bunch of other seeds (thanks Jim!) .
The envelope included very good directions as well as packages of “Jamaican Yellow Mushroom Peppers” , “Chocolate Habanero Peppers” and even a package of “Red Savina Peppers” (which I had long thought to be the hottest pepper in the world). Peppers are measured in Scoville Units. This is basically the heat you experience when you heat a hot pepper. For a long time it was thought the hottest chili pepper was about 500,000 Scovilles. After testing Bhut Jolokia samples from several different regions, it was discovered that they are about 1,000,000 Scovilles. That’s DOUBLE what we thought was the hottest.
I planted the seeds in a seed starting setup that I purchased from Park Seed earlier this season to get some tomato seeds started. The directions state that Ghost Chili seeds can take up to 6 weeks to germinate but that some Camamile Tea can help speed the germination process. I didnt feel like bothering with tea and assumed that the tea is used purely for its mild acid content. So I just diluted some Orchid Food and soaked the seed starter inserts in that instead.  Seed starting inserts soaking in diluted orchid food So the seeds are planted and put in the window. I’ll keep you all posted on what happens next….
So… Hopefully I’ll get some plants going in time for the tail end of this summers growing season. Check back in about 4 weeks for an update! If your interested in purchasing chili seeds, contact this guy…  Jim Duffy
Holy Crapola! BronxGarden.com woud like to congratulate Randy Koger for our most recent hate mail “comment” in regards out our AeroGarden review. It seems Mr. Koger was dis-heartened by our “snarky” “Shmuck-like” review. The irony here is this guy spent time to write me a comment to let me know what a piece of crap I am. Rest assured I know my job is done when a reader feels so strongly that they take the time to not only leave me a hateful comment, but they are fluently able to work the word “aint” into their prose ( prose means meants wrytin wurds Mr. Koger). Anyway, keep that there hate mail a comin. Thats what makes this here world go around.
PS: I suspect this might be the same guy who crapped his pants in the tazer posted below.
Thats right folks. Summers coming and its lawn mowin time again and there are a few things you need to know. 1. You can not and should not drive your ride-on mower in the road. 2. If you are on your mower in the road (en route to Oyster Shack) dont drink whiskey. 3. If you get tasered, there is a chance you will crap your pants.
This woman is either selling baby parts or has her child in one of the most dangerous contraptions ever. Not sure how anyone ever thought this was a good idea. She surely must be European because this could never be sold in the US.  Worst mother on planet takes her lifeless baby for a stroll
Came across this picture of some SeaWorld PR person briefing the media on the what they already knew. They have a whale that has killed about 4 people now. Personally I think whales belong in the ocean and if you want to pay money see them… get on a friggin boat. But SeaWorld thinks its better entertainment to have their trainers turned into whale turds. So now they have a whale that cant be returned to the wild and its career of doing tricks for tourists is over. So what do you do? I think they should hire the some Japanese whalers to come in, harpoon that sucker right in the tank and fire up the barbee. Maybe if the other whales watch tourists get down on some whale meat sandwiches, they will think twice before they attack another trainer. Just my .02.
So I grew up in Newburgh, NY which was featured on the front page of several papers across the US today. Why you ask? Cause its a ghetto shithole filled with scumbag thugs that collect welfare and like to gang bang. You can rest assure your tax dollars are helping these same people buy new sneakers, McDonalds, 40s, guns and drugs directly through our useless welfare program. Its so bad the FBI has thrown the Newburgh problem on our brilliant presidents desk for help. Good luck with that one! All you have to do is eliminate welfare my friends. Its as easy as that. If your caught buying or selling drugs, prostituting, stealing or getting involved in gang activity, then your welfare gets suspended for 12 months. If your caught with an illegal firearm, your welfare gets suspended for 5 years. There. Bam. Solution done. You can dam well bet gang bangers will be putting down their “gats” and picking up mops if they thought for a second they weren’t gonna gets their check at the end of the momf. Here’s the full article on our lovely City of Newburgh. http://www.recordonline.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20100306/NEWS/3060326 “Newburgh” – by Angel
 Tiger has a relapse. "Must have Hos" Lets start by talking about how poorly written Tiger’s speech was. I mean it couldn’t have been more redundant. In fact, the retard that helped him write that speech should now be required to apologize to the world for their craptastic speech writing. How about that half assed tangent about Tiger’s charity work and “the children”? You have to be kidding with that shit. No one cares about the children Tiger. Talk about your Hos! Here is how Tigers speech should have went… Thank you all for coming today. As you know, I’m the greatest golfer to ever play the game. In fact I’m the Michael Jordan of golf. No.. no.. .I’m actually somewhere between the Michael Jordan and God himself, and when your as talented, as famous and as RICH as me, you can do whatever the fuck you want. So… just to clarify for all of you media assholes sitting here in a room full of folding chairs, I didn’t come here to apologize to anyone. I came here to tell you all YOU CAN KISS MY ASS. Like many other simliarly rich, famous and powerful men, I like my hos. The difference is I like the skanky ones that tend to talk too much. For that I could be sorry but really I’m must going to chalk that up to a learning experience. What I’m really here to tell you is I’m not here to apologize to anyone despite what you thought you were going to witness today. Rather I’m here to embrace my pimp status and announce that I’ve realized that no amount of therapy is going to fix the fact that I’m rich, powerful and famous… Oh and did I mention RICH?! So I am here to day, to let the world know, that after Elin divorces my ass, its game on baby. Holllaaa! And I’m not talking about no golf. Callin all hos… whoot whoot! In conclusion I would like to say fuck all my old sponsors that made a collective BILLIONS off my talent and dumped me at the first sign of trouble and instead I would like to thank my new sponsors… Trojan Condom Brand, Cialis and Old English Malt Liquors. Now, if anyone is interested, I’ll be signing copies of my NEW video game that will be released by Rockstar Video Games, Grand Theft Auto 5 – “Tiger’s on the loose”. Peace. *drops mic on floor*
For those of you who know me, you have also probably asked yourself the same tireless question. “How did he become such a musical bad ass?” I know, I know…God gives SOME of us talent and the rest are just put on this earth to marvel in wonderment (not sure that’s even a word but who are you to judge me) at the rest of ”us”. By us I mean people such as myself who’s cup completely runneth over in musical ability. I mean.. on my worst day I spill more from my cup of musical talent than most people acquire in multiple life times of formal training (based on the idea people will someday be able to be frozen and come back and try to learn even more about music after all their organs have been regrown). But I know I will never need to be frozen like Walt Disney just so I can come back to learn more about music because I already know it all. The reason I know this is… once again. Sheer prowess in anything musical… so basically you cant even really question my logic on this babbling rant. Anyway, an undisclosed relative sent me this picture of MYSELF at about 3 years old. In this photo you can clearly see I’m in the middle of a studio session most likely with Frank Zappa on not only 1 plastic instrument BUT 2 plastic instruments! I thought I had been playing saxophone for about 20 something years but this picture clearly shows I have been playing for 30 plus years. Some of you are probably saying to yourself. I didn’t know you could play guitar. Yeah… Once again. Talent. In fact I don’t play guitar anymore because I basically mastered the plastic guitar when I was about 4 years old and vowed to never play the instrument again because I just figured why ruin it for everyone else. I continued playing the saxophone however and as far as I can tell, I mastered that instrument at the age of 4, fell on my head, forgot everything I had learned and then later in life mastered it again (similiar to Pat Martino but I did it on 2 instruments so once again not even the great Pat Martino can hold a candle to my skills). So yes… I have already forgotten more saxophone skills from falling off the couch on to my head at age 4 than most people acquire in a life time. At this point, your probably reading this saying ” He is full of shit” . Well… jealousy is a bitter mistress and unlike Bear Grylls… I have the picture to prove it.  Musical Freakin Genius
So its been exactly 3 weeks since UPS delivered my AeroGarden Veggie Pro and I can honestly tell you its been the longest 3 weeks of my life. The constant drone of this garden is really trying my patience. The ONLY reason this AeroGarden hasn’t found itself sliding down the trash shoot is because frankly it seems to work really well. I planted my 2 tomato plants on Jan 25th and exactly 3 weeks later I have 2 plants that look extremely healthy and are about 3″ tall.  3 week old hydroponic tomato plants3 week old hydro-tomato plant As I said in my original post, I was disappointed that the AeroGarden Veggie Pro ONLY contains two tomato seed pods. This seems pretty misleading because in the description on the website they talk extensively about all the different veggies you can grow BUT you can not grow anything besides the 2 tomato plants included unless you buy the “AeroGarden Master Gardener Deluxe” kit which includes blank seed pods which allow you to plant your own seeds. The fore mentioned kit is $34.95 on Amazon.com .  This is the additional kit you need to buy if you want to grow your own seeds. When my AeroGarden Master Gardener Deluxe seed kit arrive on Feb 4th, I immediately planted a “Rainbow Bell Pepper” seed (ordered from ParkSeed.com). This time I drizzled a little water on top of the seed and I’m pretty sure it germinated MUCH faster than the 2 tomato plants I started with. As you can see in the picture, the Bell Pepper plant in the middle is about 1″ high just about 10 days after I planted the seed. Just out of curiosity I pulled on of the tomato pods out to see what the roots looked like and I was amazed to see there were roots that were 8-10″ dangling in the water.  Amazing how fast the roots grow. So all in all I’m pretty impressed with the results. After about 2 weeks the AeroGarden flashed some lights that reminded me it required more water and more food. In my first post I mentioned my concern on how the power consumption of the AeroGarden would effect my power bill. The Con Ed Bill showed up the other day and it is about 4 dollars more than it usually is so I guess that’s not too bad. I’m hoping to see flowers on my tomato plants within the next 3 weeks. I believe the AeroGarden claims tomatoes in as little as 6 weeks so that means these plants have 3 weeks to start bearing fruit. We shall see.
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